It’s been over a year since I’ve done any labwork whatsoever. But I still have a scientific bent towards the little things. I don’t “observe,” I take data, I use the word “aliquots” instead of “portions,” it’s not a “procedure,” it’s a protocol.
Husband and I are (finally) officially trying to concieve (yay!) and, as one might expect from two scientists, we are trying to be scientific about it. Or at least I thought we were. Recently, we have had to make a few sacrifices. I have given up alcohol (curse you wine, why did you have to be alcoholic??) and caffeine (no more Mt. Dew or caffeinated tea *sob*). Husband has switched from briefs to boxers.
Or so I thought.
Scene: Folding laundry in the bedroom
Me: Wait a minute. What are these briefs doing in the laundry?
Husband: Well, I ran out of boxers….
Me: Why didn’t you say something?
Husband: Well, I didn’t want to pressure you to do laundry.
Me: [growing impatient] But, I could have bought some more!
Husband: I suppose….
Me: You can’t go switching from boxers to briefs and back again! That’s just.. [sputtering]…BAD PROTOCOL!
Me: I don’t want to be sitting in a doctor’s office a year from now, saying, “Well, sometimes he wore boxers!!” [muttering] Calls himself a scientist, can’t even set up a properly controlled experiment….