Of moxie and mangoes

I loved all of your suggestions for an appropriate substitute for “balls.”

Mad Hatter: I agree with you that Boobs doesn’t quite cut it. Besides which, if I said, “I don’t have the boobs to….” inevitably the person I’m talking to is going to glance at my boobs. I think it would be unavoidable. And I prefer if people do not stare at my boobs (“Hello! My face is a little higher up than that! I promise you if you look me in the eye, the boobs are not going to disappear so there is no need to scrutinize them that closely?).

ecogeofemme: I think ‘nads does just refer to male organs, at least that has always been my impression. However, since it’s short for gonads, it’s not inherently gender-specific. I think this may be a good alternative.

propter doc: I think “stones” would also be a good alternative as would “guts.” “Mangoes” is amusing and I would like it except that I think it would be interpreted as breasts (it’s a round(ish) fruit–it’s inevitable I think) and then I’m back to not wanting people to stare at my breasts. But, perhaps I could use it around women and not be in danger of them staring at my breasts.

PhysioProf: I think I like “moxie” the best out of all of the suggestions. It’s a fun word, a bit feminine (I don’t think you would ever say a man had moxie) and conveys the general connotation I’m looking for. It doesn’t have the vulgarity factor that “balls” has but I’m pretty much resigned to the fact that I will never find an acceptable gender-neutral or feminine equivalent to balls (you know, that I would be capable of actually saying.

Bora: I think your Serbian version comes a close second to moxie. But, I think it would sound better with the Serbian word rather than “eggs.” How do you pronounce “jaja” anyhow?

VWXYNot: Testicular fortitude. HAHAHAHAHA!!! I think I would giggle every time I said it.

Jenny: I think I would laugh if somebody told me I have OVES. Btw, I googled Oves and came up with this. Probably not what that person was thinking of.

Geeka: Illustrating fallopian tube location is probably better than him trying to point out where the vas deferens is (don’t, I beg of you, google vas deferens–you get some disturbing images).

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9 thoughts on “Of moxie and mangoes

  1. Great solutions! I’ve heard people use “testicular fortitude” before and I always like it (but never found the right occasion to use it myself)

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  3. Hey, jaja is great too! I can see the potential problem with mangoes, which is a pity, because it sounds great.

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